am accepting

People lie to me all the time: they lie about my future: they lie about my job opportunities: they lie about my perceptions: they lie about their intentions.

Yet I refuse to be dispirited too much.

I have lived a life where people told me lies about myself and I was only able to verbalise my painful truths in return.

A man I value for his intelligence but not his kindness recently suggested his affection not for tough love but tender cruelty.

Meanwhile, I discover I must suffer an analogous cruelty for the rest of my life.

It’s hard to come to terms with.  It’s hard to realise life is cruel because of people not because of physics.

I refuse to blame, for blame helps not one bit.

But I am accepting my road to happiness lies in learning how to lie like them.

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